Chapter 15: Early Summer

That impassable cold always causes those who love deeply to lose their footing.

—Jian Zhen, Questions of Water

Su Nan froze. “Didn’t you once say that I had no reverence for scholarship?”

Chen Zhiyu gave a quiet scoff. “Didn’t I already apologize to you?”

Knowing she probably could not outargue him, Su Nan fell silent.

Chen Zhiyu sidestepped the central issue. “Think about it. You aren’t entirely unsuited to scholarship. At the very least, you possess a mule’s stubborn determination.”

“But I’m very stupid. I once read about a kind of scholar who, if a key fell somewhere on the ground, would divide the entire area into a grid and search one square at a time. They would eventually find it, but the method would be terribly inefficient. Researching intellectual history requires a sharp mind like yours.”

“That’s all?” Chen Zhiyu’s tone was mild. “That won’t persuade me. Chongcheng University’s library has an entire room filled with old papers waiting for you to divide it into squares.”

Su Nan remained silent.

She wanted to draw closer to him, yet she knew her feelings led down a road with no return.

Even if she remained beside him for another two or three years, what would it change?

The pull of reality was too heavy to permit her to dream.

Chen Zhiyu’s gaze rested on her face. “Come to Chongcheng University. I’ll help you.”

His expression was serious. This time, his “arrangement” no longer seemed like a passing impulse but something he had carefully considered.

He rarely spoke to her in that tone. For a moment, she nearly surrendered completely.

Yet a rational voice continued screaming inside her. In the end, she did not give him a definite refusal.

“May I... think about it?”

Chen Zhiyu watched her. She had pulled a blade of grass from the ground and was winding it around her finger, loosening and tightening it until it became a knot she could not undo.

“Give me a deadline.”

After a moment, she pulled the blade of grass taut and snapped it. Raising her head, she said, “When your course ends this semester. Would that be all right?”

Once the field research concluded, Su Nan returned to Dancheng and resumed laboring away at Chen Zhiyu’s errands.

She now spent more time with him than she did with Lin Han, her actual advisor.

Even Lin Han noticed. At their academic group gathering in late May, she specifically brought it up.

The gathering was held at Lin Han’s home in central Dancheng. It was an older apartment and not particularly large, making it feel even more crowded with over a dozen people inside. Lin Han’s parents had left it to her. Although she had purchased a new home in the suburbs, she was accustomed to this apartment and still spent more time there.

Numerous flowers and plants grew on the balcony, creating such dense greenery that even the surrounding temperature seemed several degrees cooler. Several pots of azaleas were in bloom, brilliant and fiery.

Students from the first through third years crowded around the balcony entrance, exclaiming in admiration.

“Sister Han, your balcony is practically a small garden.”

Lin Han smiled. “I’m not the one who takes care of it.”

“We know. Doctor Jiang! You’re feeding us dog food again.”

The story of Lin Han and Doctor Jiang, an associate chief surgeon at Dancheng People’s Hospital, was a fine romance when examined closely.

Lin Han had completed both her master’s degree and doctorate abroad and was heavily influenced by Western thought. She had firmly resolved to remain single. Early the previous year, however, she underwent surgery at Dancheng People’s Hospital and unexpectedly met Doctor Jiang, who had also intended to remain unmarried.

The two were like “an old house catching fire,” as their students privately joked. Once the flames began, they became unstoppable. They arranged their marriage in one determined push and were now living together, though the wedding date had yet to be set.

Since then, Lin Han occasionally displayed their affection in the group chat. Her demonstrations were sophisticated, natural, and always completely unexpected, leaving the many “single dogs” despairing of life.

“Stop crowding around the balcony. Come try the cake Doctor Jiang baked.”

“Oh, come on!”

“That’s too much!”

Doctor Jiang spent the entire time working in the kitchen. Only when it was nearly time to eat did he lean out and call Lin Han over to help.

More than a dozen dishes spread impressively across the table. Lin Han opened two bottles of red wine and poured everyone a glass.

Influenced by Lin Han’s personality, the students in her academic group paid little attention to hierarchy and were never constrained around her. Their conversations ranged everywhere, lively and without taboos.

This time, however, the atmosphere was unexpectedly sorrowful because the second- and third-year students had completed their thesis defenses.

Lin Han asked each person about their current circumstances. When she reached Su Nan, she smiled.

“Su Nan, Professor Chen thinks very highly of you. He says you’ve done an excellent job as his teaching assistant. A few days ago, he was even boasting to me that he intended to coax you into pursuing a doctorate at Chongcheng University. What’s this? Are you planning to do a PhD?”

Su Nan hurriedly answered, “No. If I pursued a doctorate, I would certainly continue studying under you, Sister Han.”

“I’m not a doctoral supervisor, so I couldn’t take you. Chongcheng University is an excellent choice. Professor Chen has strict standards. If he’s willing to guide you, you’ll certainly accomplish something.”

Su Nan grew somewhat anxious. Remembering what Chen Zhiyu had said at the picnic, she glanced across Lin Han’s face before finally lowering her gaze to her hands.

“I... I’ll probably enter the workforce directly.”

“That would be fine too. Conditions are changing quickly, and employment grows more difficult every year. Jiang Mingqian, I heard you’re starting a business with someone. How is that going? A business is one thing, but if your attendance is insufficient, you still won’t graduate.”

The topic finally moved away from Su Nan, allowing her to breathe a quiet sigh of relief.

After the meal, everyone helped clean the kitchen and asked Lin Han for permission to visit her study.

Lin Han smiled. “You’ve already asked around and heard that I have a substantial collection, haven’t you? Fine. Go look around. Today, I’ll allow each of you to take one book you like, but you’ll submit a book report after reading it.”

Solid-wood bookcases reaching the ceiling covered the eastern, western, and northern walls of the study. Entering felt like walking into a small private library.

Everyone was consumed with envy.

“If I were Sister Han, I wouldn’t want to live in a barren suburban villa either. Flowers, trees, and a man. What else could anyone want from life?”

“Shh! Keep your voice down. Show some restraint!”

Su Nan walked around the study and stopped before the northern bookcase, casually examining its contents.

Jiang Mingqian darted over. “Senior Sister.”

“Mm?”

“Have you taken Dean Sun’s class?”

“I have. Why?”

“Could you let me use your assignment as a reference? I heard his failure rate is extremely high.”

“I’ll send it to you when I return.”

Jiang Mingqian smiled but showed no intention of leaving. He remained beside her, casually reaching up to browse the books while glancing at her from the corner of his eye.

“Which book are you planning to take?”

“I’m still choosing.”

Seeing Su Nan look upward, he extended his arm. “This one?”

Su Nan grew somewhat embarrassed and rubbed the tip of her nose. “No, there’s no need.”

“Wow! Is this Sister Han when she was a graduate student?”

The exclamation interrupted their awkward conversation. Su Nan turned and saw a junior student holding a framed photograph.

Before she could react, Jiang Mingqian had already pulled her over to join the excitement.

It was a graduation photograph from an American university, G University. Lin Han wore her master’s gown and held a bouquet.

Beside her stood...

“Isn’t that Professor Chen? He was so young!”

In the photograph, twenty-four-year-old Chen Zhiyu stood in his master’s gown. Lin Han was to his left, while a young woman with short hair stood to his right.

He faced the camera with a smile, but it did not reach his eyes. His gaze contained only distance and detachment.

“What secret have you dug up?”

Lin Han leaned her head through the doorway.

“Sister Han, your graduate school graduation photograph!”

“Oh.” Lin Han walked over and accepted the photograph. “You even managed to find this. Take a look. How many people do you recognize? Quite a few major figures in the field came from my graduating class.”

Everyone spoke at once and identified nearly all the people in the photograph.

Finally, someone pointed to the short-haired woman beside Chen Zhiyu.

“Sister Han, who is this?”

“The wife of your campus idol, Professor Chen Zhiyu.”

Silence descended, followed by a wail.

“Professor Chen really is married? The rumor has circulated for years, but no one has ever heard who his wife is or seen them appear together. We all thought it was false!”

Lin Han’s gaze remained calm. She placed the photograph facedown on the table.

“They keep a low profile. Stop rummaging through my photographs, or I’ll have Doctor Jiang throw you out.”

At three that afternoon, everyone left Lin Han’s home. Even after reaching the ground floor, they continued loudly discussing the shock they had just received.

Su Nan stopped and smiled. “You should go ahead. I need to return and speak to Sister Han about something.”

Jiang Mingqian looked at her. “What is it? Should I... Should we wait for you?”

“No.”

Su Nan’s expression faded as she stepped back.

No one paid much attention. The group clustered together and continued walking away.

When Jiang Mingqian reached the entrance to the residential compound, his steps stopped.

“You go ahead! I just remembered that I need Sister Han to sign something too.”

He watched the others head toward the subway station, then entered a nearby shop. After rummaging through the freezer, he took out two ice creams and headed back.

It was an older residential compound filled with tall trees. Lush greenery covered everything within sight.

Through the leaves swaying gently in the wind, Jiang Mingqian saw Su Nan sitting with her head lowered on the edge of a flower bed near the building.

He paused before slowly approaching.

“Senior Sister.”

Su Nan seemed not to hear him.

He stood there for a moment, then called softly again.

“Su Nan.”

The May afternoon sunlight filtered through the leaves. Speckled patches of light fell across her bare calves and the tops of her feet.

A pair of Converse sneakers rested on the ground.

“Ice cream. Would you like one? There are two flavors, strawberry and chocolate.”

He extended his hand.

After a moment, Su Nan slowly raised her head. A layer of moisture veiled her eyes.

She quickly wiped them and smiled hoarsely. “Some willow fluff got into my eyes. Strawberry, please.”

Jiang Mingqian remained standing where he was.

A moment later, he rested the ice cream carton against her forehead and stepped forward, sheltering her within his shadow.

He lowered his head and watched her eyelashes tremble as the forced smile finally collapsed.

“Senior Sister... stop pretending.”

Author’s Note

I didn’t consider the earlier timeline thoroughly enough, and it was somewhat rushed. The ages could just barely be made to work, but to make everything more plausible, I have slightly revised Yang Luo’s age and the timing of Professor Chen’s education in Chapters 9 and 14.

To summarize:

Professor Chen entered university at sixteen. He graduated with his bachelor’s degree at twenty and then took a gap year. At twenty-one, he changed fields and began studying communications. He completed his master’s degree in communications at twenty-four.

Yang Luo was three years older than Professor Chen. She began her undergraduate studies at eighteen and died during the first year of her master’s program at twenty-three.